


What's Up Sad Boy?

by nicockla



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, established Calum Hood/ Ashton Irwin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-06
Updated: 2019-03-06
Packaged: 2019-11-12 21:45:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18019028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nicockla/pseuds/nicockla
Summary: Request: Cashton, fluff, on tour and Calum's really sad about something, so Ash makes him feel better.





	What's Up Sad Boy?

The bus rolled around the last corner and came to a stop, Calum was wide awake and could even with no view of the windows from behind his curtain could tell that it was dark outside and that this was the end of the line for the night. That normally would have prompted him to rise from his bunk and grab a thing or two before joining the other boys for dinner and then sleep. 

He knew however if he didn't rise they'd leave him thinking he was asleep, so he stayed silent and steadied his breathing so he could listen better to the others footsteps. He heard Michael go first, he could tell because he was on the phone talking lowly to Crystal. Luke left second which he knew because he could hear the person clambering around grabbing things off the bunk from underneath him before stomping down the stairs. 

The last person was Ashton, he made sure his eyes fluttered shut, and his breathing was even as Ashton approached the bunk. He heard the other boy shuffling around, probably pulling on his shoes Calum thought. Eventually, the darkness was broken as Ashton opened the curtain and leaned over Calum grabbing his Airpods from the little shelf by Calum's bed. He heard the movement before he felt a hand gently touch at the side of his face. In just a few seconds the hand disappeared, the curtain closed and he heard the footsteps fade away. He was finally alone. 

He sighed and rolled onto his back, a solitary tear rolling down his cheek. He took another deep breath trying to control the tears but another fell and another, and another. He sobbed, his eyes closed and his head tilted back on the pillow. This is all he'd wanted his moment alone for, to cry uninterrupted and of course to make sure Ashton didn't see. Any burden of Calum's Ashton always took for himself, and it made him feel guilty. 

So he hadn't bothered to mention it to a single soul, even in passing.  The others (especially Ashton) had their problems; they didn't need the fact that Calum was having a little problem dealing with pressure on their minds. They would coddle him, Luke and Michael were working hard on their own things including their relationships. They didn't need his trivial shit. 

It still wore on him; he still felt the heavyweight in his shoulders, the pit in his stomach, the hot weight in his throat that threatened tears which lately found itself there more often than not. So moments, where he could decompress, were sacred. So he let the tears fall down his cheeks and let his sobs get louder, it was freeing to not be trying to hold everything back. He cried for ten or fifteen minutes each time he felt he'd finished he would feel the tug in his chest again and the tears would continue.  

It was during this period of fairly loud crying that Calum failed to hear the bus doors open and the footsteps of someone walking down the short corridor. He didn't realise there was anyone on the bus until Ashton's voice spoke from below, "Hey, can I come up?" 

"I'm fine," Calum's voice cracked when he answered. 

Ashton barely faltered before he responded, "didn't ask if you were fine, I asked if I could come up," 

Calum almost scoffed aloud, "yeah" he'd let out instead in no more than a breath. 

He could tell as Ashton climbed the ladder his feet were clothed from the sound they made against the metal rungs, a 'pad pad' sound rather than the sharp twang that came from shoes or bare feet. The curtain was moved by ringed fingers, and Calum instinctively rolled to the side to make room. He watched as Ashton carefully climbed his way into the bunk and sat up as much as possible in the small space with his back against the wall that served as the 'headboard'. 

As soon as the older boy stopped moving Calum scooched down the bed and laid his head on Ashton's right thigh. He let his right arm lay across Ashton's legs and let out a deep sigh, he was so tired from crying, and he knew Ashton would want to ask him questions in a few minutes.

Calum was right, Ashton let him have his few minutes just laying there. He didn't ask any questions only placed his right hand comfortingly in Calum's hair, letting his fingers mindlessly card back and forth through the thick, dark mess. 

"So," Ashton paused his hand movements, "You wanna talk about it?" the Maori boy felt the eyes of the other shift to the top of his head, waiting for him to look up and make eye contact. 

"Not really, I'm just tired and stressed," he paused, "and just overwhelmed," as he spoke he didn't lift his head to face Ashton merely looked down his leg and toward where their feet had tangled without thought. 

"How long have you been feeling like this?" Ashton asked, Calum could hear he was trying to keep his voice even. 

"Few weeks, maybe a month," He swallowed hard, and his eyes started to water again, his chest was straining trying to keep back another sob. 

He heard the hurt this time, even beneath the attempts to remain even, "Oh, okay, you think maybe you wanna see someone about it? Talk to someone who's good with this stuff?" His fingers started up again, going deep this time so his short nails made contact with the scalp, Calum relaxed at the feeling, there was something about it that made him tired and relaxed instantly. 

"Yeah, I probably should," he hummed, the tightness in his chest disappearing slowly and his eyes dropped closed. 

"I think that would be really good for you," Ashton said his eyes boring into the back of the younger boys head, Calum could feel the concern radiating off him, tell that every part of Ashton wanted to scoop him up in his arms and hold him. He was respectful though, he of all people knew that sometimes you needed something more or less than being cuddled and told everything would be okay. 

Calum opened his eyes and pushed himself up, crawling back up before flopping down on Ashton's chest, an arm automatically wrapped around his back and pulled him closer. Then a kiss was placed on top of his head. Calum pulled back and looked up at Ashton who smiled softly at him, Calum kissed him chastely on the lips which caused the older boy to grin. 

"Thank you" Calum paused, "for not being pushy," 

"Anything for you, are you feeling a bit calmer now?" Ashton's hand made it's way up under the back of Calum's t-shirt as he spoke. 

"Yeah, I'm just so tired, Ash, I'm sorry," 

He began to trace circles on the other's bare skin as he talked, "I know, you don't need to apologise we all get like this sometimes, and that's normal, but you've got to come and talk to us," 

"Just don't wanna bother you guys, Mike and Luke struggle a lot maintaining their relationships with the girls, and I just don't want them to stress more," he mumbled.

Ashton could tell he didn't have much longer left of quality conversation with Cal before he fell asleep, crying was very good at tiring a person out. "What about our relationship? I don't want you to keep distancing yourself trying to worry about me when you need to be looking after yourself. If anything happened to us, I would be devastated but if anything happened to you," Ashton's voice went up at the end as if he were asking a question, "It would kill me," when Calum looked up he saw Ashton's watery eyes and his attempt at composure. 

"I promise from now on I will fight every fibre of my being that tells me to deal with this alone, and I will come to you instead," he wrapped his arms tight around Ashton. His heart ached, he would never find anyone like Ashton Irwin again, and he hoped that the day that he would need to look for someone new never came.

Ashton smiled, and small chuckle left his mouth, "good," he said quietly, and when he looked down, he could see that Calum had his eyes closed and his head resting on Ashton's middle, a little smile on his lips.


End file.
